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| 007. 10 Ways to Leave Your Lover |
[mon sep 21st, 2009 »9:47p] |
Look, Carlin! Look, see? I'm doing it!
Ten Things You Maybe Didn't Know About Fabian Prewett But May Have Suspected1. You're not really a Prewett unless, at some point in your life, someone either convinced or forced you to eat something you now realize probably could have killed you instantly upon ingestion.
2. At school, I used to refer to detention as "the family reunion." And for good reason.
3. I socked someone in the face at my Hogwarts graduation.
4. I think I might be in love with John Wayne. I think he might shoot me if he knew, though. But hey, Cowboys Are Frequently Secretly Fond of Each Other.
5. My mum keeps bothering me to get a haircut. She will die with this wish unfulfilled. Not unlike her wish that I would get married and settle down, already.
6. Though I do so love all of the good things that vodka has done for mankind, my favorite drink is aged scotch on the rocks. Ideally, scotch that is old enough to buy its own scotch.
7. [Private from Uppity Ministry Employees] For those who were suspicious, I did break the copier at the DMLE during that Christmas Party. But I had some help, if you know what I mean. [/Private]
8. I have a bunch of tattoos, though not nearly as many as Dev, and most of them are text based, many of them in Latin. I think all purebloods go through a classics phase - otherwise we wouldn't have such fucking ridiculous names. Caesar could show up here and not feel remotely self-conscious about his odd name. Maybe that was the point.
9. My hair was kept shorter until I filled out and got all muscley because when I was a lad of about 11, I was sometimes once mistaken for a girl from behind. I didn't let it grow out until I was about 15, part of which was an attempt to distinguish myself from the rest of the Prewett clan.
10. I can tie a cherry stem into a knot with my tongue, and fit my whole fist in my mouth (though not at the same time), but I typically make a point of doing neither. It's getting your fist OUT of your mouth that's difficult, by the way.
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| 006. Two Piña Coladas, One For Each Hand |
[sun sep 6th, 2009 »11:55p] |
You know what? Today was absolutely brilliant. So everyone who comes by my flat gets free champagne and vodka (but not together, because that would be gross.) Unless you suck, in which case, stay the fuck away from my flat. Well, if you suck in a way that's widely considered to be bad at least - and I don't mean by the Catholic church.
As Always,
Fabian Prewett
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| 005. Live and Let Die |
[sun aug 16th, 2009 »6:45p] |
This is un. fucking. acceptable.
Does anyone have a book of jinxes and counter-jinxes I can borrow? Or hexes and counter-hexes? Or curses and counter-curses? It wasn't the fucking Hair Loss curse, so now I don't know what it was, and I can't grow it back until I figure out the fucking counter curse. What the fuck do they need with a baby and my hair? Really? What did they need with those things? Are they trying to start a fucking hair metal band and they're training them young? I swear to God, I am going to kill them. I am going to kill them TWICE. Once for me, and once for Alice. It will be like when they re-killed people in the middle ages. I suppose I may have to go to the library, but that would be breaking my resolve not to leave the house until my... injuries have healed.
Not one word out of you, Benjy Fenwick.
-Fabian G. Prewett
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| 004. Fabian Likes Babies That Are Not His |
[tue aug 11th, 2009 »12:08a] |
ALICE! ALICE ALICE ALICE!
I want to hold the baby. When can I hold him?
I'll be CAREFUL.
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| 003. Oh Good. |
[sun aug 2nd, 2009 »7:03p] |
Shit? Meet my good friend, Fan. Fan, Shit.
Charmed, I'm sure.
( Order )
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| 002. Москва, я тебя люблю |
[tue jul 28th, 2009 »1:40a] |
[Private to the Order - and Carlet O'Hara, of course]
Dear Order Members,
Olympic gymnasts are amazing in bed.
They barely speak English, always have vodka, and are terribly eager to please. And did I say "flexible"? I'd be remiss if I didn't.
Thought you should all be aware of this indisputable fact.
Moscow, I love you.
-Fabian "Godlike" Prewett, esq
[/Private]
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| 001. Mo' Money, Mo' Problems. |
[sun jul 12th, 2009 »11:40p] |
My employer had damn sure better not try to hold out on my pay this week because of all that business with Gringott's. And really, the man would have no excuse to. I happen to know for certain that the madman who owns that place has kept most of his cash hidden in his mattress ever since he started thinking that the ministry was keeping tabs on all of his bank transactions. Watching my rapidly shrinking tips is bad enough without him trying to delay payment. At least Gid and I are payed up on our flat until the end of the month. Otherwise we'd all be shit out of luck.
I think I'll be able to scrape together enough for groceries until I get my pay, but my gin supplies are all but depleted, and God knows that's what we really need during times of economic downturn. The temptation to "borrow" a bottle from the bar has been more tempting than usual. I mean, come on, since when is it gross misconduct to take your work home with you? Some people would call that initiative.
Here's hoping I don't end up having to run home to mum to keep myself adequately fed. But I'd probably resort to tricking out Gideon at that dodgy pub in Brixton before I allowed that to happen. (Come on, Gid. You know it's about time you started pulling your weight.)
-Fabian G. Prewett, esq.
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